3 Reasons You’re Stuck in a Rut Right Now and How to Turn It Around

Oct 15, 2018 | Health, Mindfulness, Personal Development

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STUCK. This has got to be the number one word I hear over and over again.

“I just feel so stuck.”

And it’s such a frustrating feeling too. Where you can recognise you don’t want to be ‘in it’ yet you have no clarity about how to get out of it or what to do next. Want to know the 3 biggest reasons that this feeling keeps showing up in your life?

Reason 1: You’re running the same pattern because you feel safe.

When we keep doing the same thing over and over again, we get the same results. (Not surprisingly!). Yet why do we keep doing the same thing then? When we’re stuck in a loop it’s because something is keeping us there. Something about that loop feels familiar, comfortable, we get a certain level of safety within it. You know what to expect so in some way there’s not going to be any surprises.

Reason 2: It’s easier to say Yes to others than Yes to you.

Which means you’re always the last on your priority list. This one I notice all the time. How quickly and easily will we turn to friends, family, colleagues, and assist them first before checking in with ourselves about what it is we most need. This one keeps us running around thinking we’re going to ‘get around’ to us, yet by the time we do (and if we do), we’re exhausted with little remaining energy. Sound familiar?

Reason 3: You’re focusing on the wrong stuff.

This one’s pretty natural, it’s the way we’re wired as human beings. We focus on what we don’t want instead of what we do want. Just listen to yourself speak (even inside your own head), the dialogue is often about what’s not working, or how we don’t want to feel stressed and busy. How often do you stop and ask yourself, well what is it exactly that I do want?

Turning Things Around:

The message here is super simple.

Change is not about big grand gestures. In my experience the kinda change that really sticks around for good is the kind that shows up in teeny weeny ways. Like slowly turning the dial on the radio to find the ‘in tune’ again channel.

I tell all my clients to ‘chunk it down!’. Overwhelm has a sneaky way of slipping in through the cracks when you least expect it, so go easy on yourself and make it really easy. Anything you’re looking to change or do differently ask yourself:

What’s the easiest thing I could do right now? If this was a smaller step what would that look like?

For example, you’re sick of being busy and stressed at work. I say don’t rock up at the office tomorrow and quit. I say do ask yourself what’s one less thing I could do tomorrow that wouldn’t really matter if it didn’t get done? Gradually doing that one smaller thing will also give you the clarity you need to connect back in to what’s really important to you. And hey, that could lead to you quitting your job. It could also lead to you falling back in love with your job.

The tiny steps actually train your brain to know it’s safe and okay to start acting in that way.

On the theme of starting small, I’d say turning things around is also about simply noticing the patterns that are going on for you right now.

Where are you saying Yes lots and how is that impacting your energy? What’s one thing you’d really love to do for you that keeps getting put off?

And if it feels like a biggy, what’s a smaller version of that thing that would still make you feel the way you want to feel right now? Schedule it. Now! And chances are that means removing something from your diary… 😉

I’m not here to give you a Ten Point Action Plan. Because ultimately, the action comes from you once you’ve got clear on noticing and have started to get into the habit of making things easier for yourself. So start there. Start small. That’s where the real magic starts to unfold, because that’s where you actually start to do something different. Which is where your results actually start to change.

Want more ways to get unstuck fully? Join us for our life coaching workshop on Saturday 20th October, Reclaim Your Life From Busy. Click here to book..

Danielle Brooker brings her own experience of getting ‘unstuck’ and moving from a place of feeling unworthy and burnt out to reconnecting with herself and living life fully. Learning to say yes to herself more often she switched gears in her career and followed her heart from Australia to London. Passionate about growth, great coffee and all things wellbeing, her personal coaching business, The Daisy Patch, now helps others who are stuck—wanting to reclaim their lives from ‘busy’ and reconnect with themselves.

Danielle is a certified practitioner of Meta Dynamics, the next level of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). Her clients are looking to identify the root cause of their discomforts—whether that be in their careers, relationships, or life itself—not just the symptoms, so that the change they make really lasts. Through her workshops and individual client programmes, her focus is always on a personal approach, sharing her own journey, and helping others to bring more wellbeing into their lifestyles.